September 2010
Here’s my “power outfits,” in response to Gala’s post…
This was right after I’d bought this shirt & skirt, & I still love them. Comfortable & cute.
I wore a high-waisted skirt for the first time in grade 10 & immediately became a convert. They make me feel so sleek & put-together. It also helps that this one is 100% silk & cost me...
August 2010
amusing e-mail exchange with the ex-lover from...
Ex-Lover: I am watching your YouTube videos. You impress me sooo much. I'm not sure I believe you're real, because you're just too incredible.
Me: Thank you but i must assure you i am real. imaginary people do not get infected tonsils nor do they have to live without air conditioning to keep their mucous membranes tolerably moist.
4 tags
[Amanda] Palmer IS her art. And, in turn, her art is an extension of who she...
– Amanda’s bio
Me: Stop mockin' me!
Max: I'm not mockin', I'm emulatin'!
Me: Where did you learn that word?
Max: What do you mean, where did I learn that word?
Me: ...What the question asks is what I want to know.
Max: I learned it from you, ya dumb shit!
WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO DIE
Any pain to be suffered comes first. ...
– P. M. H. Atwater ”Beyond the Light: The Mysteries and Revelations of Near-Death Experiences” (via psylophyta)
The Anti-Fast Food Diet (via Zen Habits) →
Your friends should make you feel good, make you laugh, & be people you are...
– Gala Darling
I hate when people say that being gay is a choice. Because that means that...
– Wanda Sykes (via liquorinthefront, lgbtlaughs)
A story I just told my mom
I was walking & a woman leaned out her car window & yelled, “Nice socks!” Then, a few minutes later, a guy leaned out his window & yelled, “Nice fucking socks!” Then, another guy leaned out & said, “Show me your boobs!”
The Weight Escape
Hello internet.
I’ve made a commitment: I’m going to lose at least 20 lbs by the end of 2010.
Like many people, I find that I’m more motivated to get shit done when I know someone (or multiple someones) is watching my progress - mainly because failure is embarrassing - which is why I’m telling the internet about this venture.
I made a giant list of different ideas in...
I wrote this on the ride home from a resort where...
cruisewear, we called you cruisewear
for those hawaiian shorts you’d wear
with clothes so loud, they hurt our eyes
you were one of our favorite guys
flowers & neon & plaid
i’m glad you are somebody’s dad
sneezy, we called you sneezy
after the dwarf, though he’s less sleazy
with sneezes so loud, in a rich baritone
you’d go “ah-ah-ah,”...
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Max & I, via text
Max: The urinals at _____ say 'sloan' on them.
Me: Omg omg omg. I was hoping you'd never discover my secret life
Max: Oh dear and a half!!
When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
– Wayne Dyer
Me: Did you hear my song about you?
Max: ...No?
Me: Oh. Do you wanna hear it?
Max: ...Is it a real song?
Me: ...No.
Max: Oh...
Me: Well, it went like this... "Maxy likes to sit around, doin' nothiiiin'!!"
Max: Oh, yeah, I heard that one. I laughed, & then continued to do nothing.
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Here's what I think about Amanda Palmer...
1. My ex ADORES Amanda/The Dresden Dolls, & has a tattoo which was meant to symbolize both Amanda & I simultaneously (hint: the symbol, which is also the title of an AP song, is one I use often & appears three times in this sentence). So, naturally, I feel kind of connected to her, in that way & in others.
2. I didn’t know she played the uke when I started to play it (or...
We no longer need men to treat us equally. We need women to treat each other...
– Sarah Silverman
songwriting statistics
I wrote 6 songs in 2006, 12 in 2007, 23 in 2008, & 29 in 2009.
In the FIRST HALF of 2010, I wrote THIRTY-ONE songs.
So yeah, my projected total for this year is more than twice my total for last year.
All I can say is, thanks to the one or two jerks who were rude & evasive to me this year, because without rude evasive jerks, I don’t know what I’d ever write about!
Lucky that my breasts are small & humble so you don’t confuse them...
– Shakira