This song has pretty terrible lyrics but it has somehow charmed its way into my heart.
This may have something to do with the nostalgia factor - Glenn’s 2002 album World Outside My Window used to play a lot on my favorite radio station when I was 10, so it was some of the first music I was exposed to that wasn’t what my parents listened to.
I am so grateful that my body is strong & youthful & can handle all-nighters whenever my mind feels like it wants ‘em! I am so grateful for hilarious comedy movies & the fact that there are SO MANY I have yet to see! I am so grateful for electronic methods of communication, like Skype & MSN & texting, which allow me to keep in touch with my friends pretty much at all times! I am so grateful that I have the capacity to enjoy music on such a profound level! I am so grateful that I had a crazy spiritual experience last week & have been dreamily pondering it ever since! I am so grateful that life still (& always) has the ability to surprise me! I am so grateful that everything is changing & growing & evolving & getting better! I am so grateful that my boyfriend & I discuss our relationship in Pokemon metaphors sometimes & it makes me laugh & feel so lucky! I am so grateful that OkCupid actually works & so I can feel 100% confident about recommending it to my romantically downtrodden friends! I am so grateful that I am growing up & becoming a woman! I am so grateful that I love my friends & family so so so so so much & the feeling is mutual! I am so grateful that I finally got into Augusten Burroughs because I fucking adore the way he writes! I am so grateful that I have FORTY books sitting in my room just waiting to be devoured this summer! I am so grateful for the Toronto Public Library system which allows me to request that a book be delivered to my home branch & then just swing by & pick it up - MAGIC! THE FUTURE! I am so grateful that everything is working out in my favor! I am so grateful that writing entries like this really does improve my mood as much as it’s supposed to! I am so grateful that happiness is like a jolt of caffeine in my bloodstream! I am so grateful that happiness & caffeine are, for me, essentially interchangeable, & one leads to the other, & they’re deliciously interwoven, but certainly not codependent! I am so grateful that I write beautiful songs & learn to play other people’s beautiful songs! I am so grateful that life is a huge magnificent buffet of potential experiences & I get to pick & choose the ones I want!
I love chai tea! I love weird crazy sensory flashbacks! I love tweeting on emotional whims! I love BitTorrent! I love Ron Burgundy! I love Christina Applegate’s face! I love fresh pears! I love oatmeal! I love waffles with maple syrup! I love the nightgown I’m wearing right now, which has a picture of a bear dressed as a wizard & holding a jack-o-lantern! I love the cast of my play! I love Cadence! I love Max! I love all-nighters when I feel this good! I love getting absorbed in a really excellent book & just soaking up the brilliance of it for hours at a time! I love Formspring! I love how much I am fascinated & enthused by the fresh deliciousness of internet anonymity! I love that a medium is just a medium & you can choose to take it in any direction you wish! I love being awake for the sunrise! I love Jeremy Larson’s song “The Thief,” especially “your solar-powered girl is never going to last”! I love disobeying language conventions just ‘cause I feel like it! I love Shameless magazine! I love Book City! I love how brilliant & talented & creative my friends are (especially, at this moment, Kathleen, who blows my mind on a regular basis)! I love Mr. Levin’s history class! I love that I get to continue to be a part of the Rosedale community next year when I’m coaching the improv team! I love that I feel fearless when I’m happy! I love how easy it is to melt away my resistance & fear! I love my feeble-yet-noble attempts at meditation! I love my super-sexy-fine mega-cute uber-smart crazy-sweet utterly hilarious boyfriend! I love my soft skin! I love my lush curves! I love Flickr & Tumblr & Twitter & Gmail! I love Toronto!
Wouldn’t it be nice if rehearsal today went exactly the way I wanted it to? Wouldn’t it be nice if Cadence & Ben were all healed up & full of energy & creative ideas? Wouldn’t it be nice to be hit by inspiration for poems & personal narrative pieces for my webzine? Wouldn’t it be nice to do my morning pages in front of my SAD lamp while listening to Jeremy Larson? Wouldn’t it be nice to have a cozy, delicious dinner with Damian tomorrow night? Wouldn’t it be nice to transform my stagefright into pure creative energy? Wouldn’t it be nice to knock the audience’s socks off? Wouldn’t it be nice if our last 3 improv shows of the year were our best of the entire year? Wouldn’t it be nice if I always felt this confident & powerful? Wouldn’t it be nice to write a fantastic & articulate artist’s statement for my abstract painting? Wouldn’t it be nice if my average hovered at a 93 so I wouldn’t have to worry about high school marks ever again? Wouldn’t it be nice to read & read & read? Wouldn’t it be nice to feel energized like a fawning flower all day? Wouldn’t it be nice to be sociable & happy & giggly & bubbly & to radiate pure positive energy all over anyone I talk to today? Wouldn’t it be nice to get dressed up cute & feel like a supervixen & a sexy minx & other words that contain “X”? Wouldn’t it be nice to laugh even more than I usually do? Wouldn’t it be nice to chill out & relax into the awesomeness that is my life? Wouldn’t it be nice to release my worries & fears & just take things as they come? Wouldn’t it be nice to be right here right now & always live in the present moment? Wouldn’t it be nice to writewritewrite? Wouldn’t it be nice to have stellar epiphanies & revelations through journaling, like I usually do? Wouldn’t it be nice to discover more things I never knew about myself?
“That’s what gay people need to be allowed to do – get married. Not have domestic partnerships; that’s not acceptable. I don’t believe for a moment [gay marriage] would destroy the sanctity of marriage. But let’s just say for a moment that it does. Well, then the sanctity of marriage just has to be destroyed. It’s just too bad. You can’t have one set of benefits and only give them to some of the people.”—Augusten Burroughs
Commit to doing it every day for 30 days, as a trial period. You may find that once you’re into the habit, you will want to stay in the habit.
You may find it helpful to buy a nice journal &/or a nice pen, to motivate you to write. This definitely isn’t necessary, however.
Don’t freak yourself out by setting a minimum word length or page length. Just write however much seems natural, whenever you feel like it.
If you have no clue what to write, ask yourself one or more of the following questions:
1. What happened to me today? How do I feel about that?
2. What happened to other people in my life today? How do I feel about that?
3. What happened in the world today? How do I feel about that?
4. How do I feel, in general?
5. What do I want? Why do I want it? How am I going to get it?
6. What’s coming up in the next little while? How do I feel about that?
7. What have I dreamed about recently? What do I think that means?
8. What made me happy today? &/or What am I grateful for today?
9. What have I accomplished recently that I am proud of?
10. What have I read/watched/bought/seen recently? How did it affect me?
Even if it seems like you have nothing to say, often you will blather on for a page or two & then suddenly tap into something deeper. Keep going; the point of journaling is to access the feelings that are lurking under the surface, & sometimes you have to work through a lot of superficial crap to get there.
By the way - if you are the type of person who enjoys doing visual art, there is no reason you can’t intersperse some drawings, paintings, or collages in with your writing! Check out my art journals & zines for examples.
“There is no need to spend more than 15 minutes a day in passive meditation because life was meant for living, not sitting! I used to think I would have to become a monk and meditate all day to be happy, but now I realize that life is much more fun when I’m actively creating with positive thoughts, not just stopping my negative thoughts.”—Jessica Mullen
Hey, you've got quite a wonderful blog. Congrats!!
You mention in some of your journal pages "manifestation rituals", how do you do them? Why do you think they're important?
A manifestation ritual can be a lot of different things - there’s no one way to do it. I think it has to be individualized.
I haven’t done one in a long while but typically this is what I do:
1. Go to a comfortable, quiet space where you won’t be interrupted
2. Write out a list of things you want, in enough detail to get you excited about it
3. Choose an item on the list and focus on it, letting the positive emotions well up inside you
4. Visualize/imagine your life if that wish came true, and how good that would feel
5. Write, or talk out loud, as if the wish had already come true; really get into that persona
6. Repeat #3-5 for each item on the list
7. Afterward, prolong that happy headspace for as long as you can, via gratitude lists, thinking about more happy things, or even just watching a funny movie or reading a good book
This stuff sounds really strange but it’s alarming how well it has worked for me, on a number of occasions.
“We hold onto books we’ve already read, as trophies of our reading accomplishments. We hold onto books we might read in the future (but probably won’t), with the optimism that our future selves are going to be more amazing readers than we’ve ever been in the past. In truth, you only need three or four books — the ones you might read in the next month. Then after you’ve read those, donate those books to charity, and check out a few books from the library.”—Leo Babauta
I am NEVER looking to be rated [on my outfit photos].
As a girl who is extremely confident & secure with my personal style, I post my outfit photos for a few reasons: 1) to document my style for my own reference, 2) hopefully to inspire others, & 3) to receive positive feedback. NOT to be rated, NOT to be given criticism (even if it’s constructive).
I don’t think it’s right to rate other people’s outfits unless they specifically ask you to, because in doing that, you’re devaluing their personal style through the paradigm of your own.
Also, because rating looks further affixes the completely untrue idea that an outfit is either “chic” or “not chic.” Good style is not a binary, nor is it a sliding scale from good to bad. Good style is distinct & may not always receive high average ratings, because a good, well-fleshed-out style won’t appeal to everyone. & that’s how it should be.
I think, for me, the unspoken rule in the rare times I do rate outfits is this: Just because it’s not my style or my exact taste, doesn’t mean it has no value or deserves a low rating. & I think that’s what most people (lookbook.nu snobs, cough cough) don’t understand about rating, which is why generally, the high-rated looks on those websites are all in the same trendy vein.
When I get negative feedback on my outfit photos (it’s rare, but it does happen), I tend to either delete it or reply with a sassy answer that essentially says, “I don’t care that you don’t like my ______, I’m going to keep wearing it anyway because I like it.”
I think, in general, our society is still a bit phobic of people having their own unique styles that aren’t necessarily Vogue-approved, & the rating system is perpetuating that.
Ten things I’m grateful for
1. My comforting, supportive family
2. My brilliant, creative friends
3. My clever, lovely boyfriend
4. My sweet, cuddly, crazy cat
5. Cute, colorful clothes to wear
6. Delicious, healthy food to eat
7. Energizing, inspiring music to listen to
8. The internet connecting me to the world
9. My own customized, private space (i.e. bedroom)
Nine of my favourite things in the world
1. Sexy perfume
4. Cashmere sweaters
5. Reading good books
6. Long naps
7. Tea dates with friends
8. Outdoor outfit photoshoots
9. Getting dressed up
Eight emotions I want to experience
4. Pleasant surprise
5. Creative inspiration
6. Profound connection
Seven awesome aspects of Toronto
1. The public transit system, which just makes sense
2. Beautiful parks & parkettes
3. Many small independent cafés
4. You can always find a sushi place when you want one
5. Fantastic theatre scene
6. Unbelievably amazing art schools
7. I can dress crazy & no one cares
Six things I love about Cadence
1. She gets me out of my comfort zone when I need it
2. She dresses really cool
3. Her OkCupid success encouraged me to seek out my own
4. She’s super queer & fun to have around at Pride
5. She always knows how to get where we’re going
6. She’s the best photographer I know
Five wonderful things about me
1. I dress fucking awesome & enjoy every second of it
2. I celebrate & adore my curvy body
3. I encourage & help other people to get happy & stay positive
4. My big fat lips are good for kissin’
5. My own approval is the only approval I need
Four new things I’d love to try
2. Being in a band
3. Publishing a zine of my writing
4. Loooooong yoga sessions
Three things I’m looking forward to
1. Performing in the Fringe Festival
2. Coaching the improv team
Two mini-goals for today
1. Write a couple pieces for my lit project
2. Read some more of Possible Side Effects
One glitter-fuelled wish for the future
1. I want my mom to be amazingly, startlingly, deliciously happy, not to mention entirely, 100% healthy.
-hot coffee in the morning (or, alternatively, an iced peppermint latte)
-music recording technologies
-the excitement of ambition
-searching through the “singer/songwriter” and “orchestral” tags on Bandcamp
-“keep re-introducing yourself to the thing that scares you and associate it with happier memories until you feel more comfortable and not scared of it anymore”
-self-reassurance through journaling
-heavy, cool rain
-Aspetta and the lovely people who come to see me play there
-Used To Be Mine
-Theatresports, which I had missed so much
-corn on the cob at midnight while watching Justin Timberlake and snuggling with the boyf under a Mexican blanket
-helping my mom with her blog
-the Barry Gibb Talk Show
-“Hey Coz, remember that time we sat by the velvety thing in a theatre, and then it opened and I saw a guy who I thought I recognized but I wasn’t entirely sure, I thought he might be a filmmaker whose first name is Tim and who’s married to Helena Bonham Carter?” “Oh, you mean the time we sat by the curtain, and you weren’t quite certain, but you thought you saw Tim Burton?”
-Damian and I shopping for temporary tattoos and then sticking them on each other
-back to basics
-fresh fruit and veggies erryday
-Augusten Burroughs on clearance
-acrylic abstracts and action painting
-“don’t matta none”
-watching epic fireworks with some of my favorite people
-getting back into writing poetry, for my lit culminating, which will be a multimedia webzine (!!)
-“it is my suspicion that stubborn Taureans won’t move forward unless they are scared shitless of what’s behind them”
-a slew of toddlers with pretty names
-making anti-prom plans
-cinnamon spice tea and a bright airy window seat
I am so grateful that creativity always returns to me if I relax & allow it.
I am so grateful that Damian is so sweet & supportive.
I am so grateful that the weather is gorgeous today & every day lately.
I am so grateful to have been exposed to so many fantastic educators on a multitude of subjects.
I am so grateful for this chillz period at the end of the school year where work is sporadic & play abounds.
I love Damian.
I love colorful abstract paintings.
I love nerdy glasses on just about anyone.
I love independent courses.
I love my mom.
I love oatmeal.
I love fresh fruit in the morning.
I love a cool breeze over a warm day.
I love plotting creative projects.
I love myself.
Wouldn’t it be nice to write brilliant poetry?
Wouldn’t it be nice to attend an improv team hangtime?
Wouldn’t it be nice to plan my Anchorman party for June?
Wouldn’t it be nice to sit somewhere quiet & kiss my boyfriend?
Wouldn’t it be nice to make a gratitude vlog?
“Think about the fundamental experience of listening to music alone, with good headphones, carefully taking apart the construction of the song - making it all make sense to you, figuring out what draws you in, what you like and what you don’t - while also being entirely blanketed in the sound and emotion of the song. When we listen alone, we are making the music a part of us.”—my brilliant friend Kaiya Cadé
Here’s a little secret I discovered along the way…
In your art journal, no-one can tell you how to draw. Or how not to draw. There are no teachers, guides, aunts that know better, experts, specialists, therapists, bullies, friends who mean well, productivity analysts, professors, parents, mean kids, annoying cousins, coaches, supervisors. No-one.